Thanksgiving always marks the beginning of the holiday season for most Americans. Although some look forward to the end of the year for the food and festivities, what I cherish most about the last months of the year is the reminder to reflect.
Time to think back on the year and all that’s happened.
Moments I want to take with me. Blunders I want to forget. And memories I will cherish forever.
Goals that were met. And those I’m still striving for. Dreams I dared to dream. And how different dreams look when awake. Dreams you birthed. Dreaming together. Apart. And together again.
Things I said too quickly. Things I left unsaid. And things I regret not having said sooner. Things I wish you had said. Things you said without words. Words we said no matter how we felt.
Hugs I gave. And received. Wishing I had held on a little longer, knowing now what I know. That some days end too soon. Moments filed away in yesterday. Times when your hug was all I had left and when it was all I needed.
Dances I swayed to. Music that spoke the story of my heart. Songs that I played on repeat during the springs and falls of my seasons. Lyrics that said it when I couldn’t speak. Times when being in your arms and feeling your heartbeat against mine was the tune that carried me through another storm.
Hands I held. Loosely when I feared being known. Tightly when I feared letting go. Lonely at times even when my hand was lost in yours. And so many times, your fingers entwined in mine to remind me I wasn’t walking alone.
Smiles shared across the room. Smiles forced when others were watching. Smiling at you when you had no idea how happy you make me. And moments I caught you smiling at me and acted like I never saw. Tickled I still make you smile.
Tears I shed in your shoulder. Tears I shed alone into my pillow. Tears I wiped from your cheeks. Tears I couldn’t cry when my heart got clouded with me. Tears that came before healing like the rain before a rainbow.
Kisses. Kisses hello. And kisses goodbye. Kisses missed. And kisses longed for. Kisses because we always kiss goodnight. Then the kisses that came slowly and lingered on my lips long after you left me. Took my breath away. And reminded me that you’re my prince. Even when I didn’t feel like a princess.
Time. Time wasted and time treasured. Minutes lost. Moments cherished. Seconds when time stopped, the world ceased spinning, and it was just you and me. Me and you. Pictures of us painted on my mind’s canvas. The Rolodex of my daydreams. The slideshow I fall asleep to.
Love. Loving moments missed. Love chosen. Love learned. Deciding to love. Each and every day. When I felt like it. And when I didn’t. When you felt like it. When you didn’t. We loved each other, and that’s what matters in the end.
Thank you for walking this bumpy road of love with me. To another year. And another season. Happy Thanksgiving, love of my life. So thankful for you.
More About the Author:
Rajdeep Paulus is the author of Swimming Through Clouds, is mommy to four princesses, wife of Sunshine, a coffee-addict and a chocoholic.
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